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We’re turning it into a very lad -oriented podcast.

Oi, oi.

Oi, oi.

When did Oi, oi become the lad?

Cool.

See, the thing is, I have never lived in the UK,

and so I heard that from comedians.

It’s pretty old, because the guys I listened to,

the British comedians I would have listened to,

would have been, like, when I heard them,

it was already quite old.

So I’m thinking it would have been, like,

late 90s, early 2000s.

You’re not walking around the UK hearing that sound,

from my experience, but…

No, but it seems like when people talk about it,

they make that noise.

It’s a bit mythical.

Mythical lad sound.

It’s very possible that no one’s ever gone oi, oi in their life,

and it’s just something that’s stuck.

Like one of those mental effects.

We all imagine them saying it, but they never actually did.

Do you have any of those in your life?

The most famous one for me is the Berenstain Bears,

and I actually now do not know how to spell it,

because I know it’s spelled one way,

but mythically is a different one.

That’s all I know about, because it’s from the internet,

but I’ve never grown up with those books in the UK.

I can’t think of a single one.

Because it is the Mandela effect.

Yeah.

And so what is it about Nelson Mandela?

I actually forget.

I think the actual fact was that Nelson Mandela died in prison,

which he did not.

Oh, okay.

I knew he didn’t think.

I think that was the effect that people believe is true.

I might be immune to that,

because I was still alive when he got out of prison,

so it was really big news.

Oh, okay.

So I bet it’s post that event.

People just think he died in prison.

Yeah, I didn’t.

I had no exposure to the events of that,

so I don’t know.

I can’t really appreciate the…

Well, that’s what I mean.

If you were born or at an age where news wasn’t getting to you,

not knowing that makes perfect sense.

I know at work,

I deal with people who are way younger than me,

and some of my coworkers who are older as well,

they can’t accept that these young people

don’t know some stuff that they know,

and then in my head I’m like,

yeah, but you’re talking about a movie

that was like 20 years before they were born.

Why would they know that?

No, yeah, that’s a good point.

And so I always do.

There are maybe staples.

Yeah, but even so,

when in your life,

how far back do you go before you were born

to assume something is still relevant?

If it’s a couple of years before you were born,

I’m like, there’s actually no reason

for someone to go back to that.

It might get pushed into their culture,

because in America,

they watch a movie every year at Christmas.

It’s a wonderful life.

So there is a chance people have seen that,

but now with TV falling to the wayside,

I actually assume that they’re not even

going to watch that anymore.

I don’t think anyone below my generation,

I wouldn’t assume that they’ve watched anything

because I’m more likely to assume

that they’ve seen a meme on TikTok,

the movie that’s well known.

Yeah, so what happened in the last group,

we did intake and I’m 53

and the youngest guy was 22.

And he and I shared more in common

because we both were clearly into the internet,

like deep into it.

So I made jokes.

He’s the only one who got some of my jokes.

And I thought that was really weird

because the guys were like 25 or 30.

They weren’t getting it

because they weren’t in the same little area

of the internet.

The internet moves fast as well.

So those three years make a big difference.

Well, I’m using the internet now

to try to maintain a certain level of relevance

so that I can communicate with people.

So like I know what they’re talking about and stuff.

Like when the first time I did it on purpose

is when Twilight got really popular.

And I was like,

well, I know this isn’t for me,

but I’m going to watch it

so that when people talk about Twilight,

I know what they’re talking about.

Like 10 minutes in,

I’m like,

I am not the target demographic for this film.

But I could at least admit like,

no, I don’t think they were going for,

again, I said that time I was probably in my 40s.

They’re not going for 40 year old men

who can mentally put themselves

in the mindset of a high school girl

who’s in love with a vampire.

I guess I could have maybe felt like the vampire.

The old creepy,

the 100 year old dude creeping on a high school girl.

That makes more sense.

Well, maybe they were intending for you, Peter,

to kind of relate to the dad.

He’s kind of worried about.

He’s useless though.

He’s like,

the Edward is clearly,

something’s going on

and the dad didn’t check it out

and he’s against the relationship.

Nah, man, he was useless.

He’s a sheriff.

Yeah, cops are useless.

Oh yeah.

We just turned into an anti -cop.

Well, we’ve got to talk about the topics that matter.

So, oh, should I do an intro?

I should do an intro.

This is the problem

is we start talking

and start having a good time

and then I don’t actually do an intro.

Enter the mind of the academy

Chalk my big chest

Where the best is a philosophy

Drinking at lunch

Brings verbal skills

Like a sucker punch

Woke up to CMRB

Yeah, yeah

CMRB

Yeah, yeah

CMRB

Yeah, yeah

CMRB

Yeah, yeah

Are you recording right now?

I start recording

basically as soon as we start talking

because then I could

I have a choice

I could play like a little pre -bit

and then the intro song

and then the podcast

or I could take the stuff we talk about

and then like move it to the middle or the back

I can do some editing

Okay

Oh, we should

one day

we should

we should stage a big fight

and we’re going to have

we’re going to fall out

we’re going to get

person and call each other names

and then clip that as the intro

and then just never get to that point

at all in the podcast

That’s a really good idea

I actually think

fake beef is very funny

Like I think

I think if you could

if I was famous

I would like

I would say shit about other famous people

who I’ve never met

Be like, yeah, yeah

that guy

that guy borrowed 50 bucks off me

and never paid it back

he’s a piece of shit

I never be like

oh my god

why

and they go to this other like

famous singer or something

and go like

why did you not pay back the $50

it’s just $50

he’d be like

I don’t know what the fuck

you’re talking about

I’m like

that’s what he always says

I don’t know what you’re talking about

I can see some people

doing that really well

and then other people

getting a seasoned assist

on you or something

There was

there was

The ones who will

will get it

and they’ll

carry along with it

There was a British actor

I saw a clip of him

the other day

I can’t remember his name

but he basically

didn’t like doing interviews

so he just lied

like he just said

whatever he wanted to say

in the moment

and he’s just like

well because

what matters

and he played

he played the role

of a gay dude

in a movie

and then the interviewer

is like

well was it difficult

for you to get into the role

he’s like

no because I’m gay

and he’s not

I was just like

oh that’s actually

really cool

Who knows that thing?

I don’t know

he was pretty old

and the clip I saw

was actually pretty old

as well

but he was just saying

like I hate interviews

they ask the dumbest questions

so I just say

whatever pops into my head

and you can tell

he’s like

because it doesn’t matter

this is a clip

of Michael Gambon’s

interview from Top Gear

to be honest

you are actually

quite famous

aren’t you

for making stuff up

in interviews

stories

yeah

well you have to

because I hate interviews

oh god sorry

well I do

I mean it’s awful

I just tell lies

so if someone

I know you did once

tell an interviewer

you were a member

of the Royal Ballet

yeah I said

that was a valid answer

at the Royal Ballet

what are you laughing at?

and he said

why did you give it up?

I said I fell off the stage

at the opera house

and went through

a kettle drum

then you told someone else

you were gay

yes

I said I was gay

the man said

you played Oscar

I played Oscar Wilde

he said

did you find that difficult?

I said no I didn’t

he said

what about the homosexuality?

so that annoyed me

you know

and I said

well I found that

very easy

because I used to be

a homosexual

and he was so thick

you know

he said

I said

but I was forced

to give it up

and then he asked

the question

he said

oh why was that?

why was that?

I said

because it made

my eyes water

and I thought

I thought he’d laugh

but he didn’t

he wrote it down

well that’s right

and if the purpose

of the interview

is to be entertaining

then

that’s entertaining

because if

is the point

of the interview

to get information

or to be entertaining

when you’re talking

to someone

who essentially

is not important

they’re just famous

they’re in a movie

promoting their movie

does anyone give a shit

if what you’re saying

is accurate?

yeah I think

entertainment

would actually

take a priority

I’d say

as long as

you’re not lying

explicitly about

the movie

as long as

the interview

drives people

to watch that movie

then everything

you say is fine

alright so

next time

we’ll do an interview

with you

and you can just

make up all your answers

you’ll be pretending

to promote a movie

and we’ll promote

the new Spider -Man movie

that you’re in

absolutely

which I definitely

am in

yeah

you would be

I think you’d be

a good Spider -Man

well

I couldn’t perform

any stunts

well they have stuntmen

and I wouldn’t look good

in a bodysuit

unless it was like a

you say that

added muscle bodysuit

they can do that

but I think

I think

essentially

if you’re going to

be a Spider -Man

you get like a

three month run up to it

where they would do

some training

so you would get

to your workout

and you would look good

like we can always say

there’s always a

base looking good

and then they can put

the muscle suit

on top of that base

I think you’d be

a great Spider -Man

I’m putting you up

for the next Spider -Man

like that’s the case

thank you very much

of all the superheroes

I do like Spider -Man

I’m not really into

superheroes

but I love

I love Spider -Man

and I love X -Men

I have never gotten

into X -Men

I think

I’d never read the comics

when I was a kid

and then

when I grew up

I started watching

the movies

and the movies

were not very good

and there was one

I think it was the third one

where there’s like

these big robots

that kill all the X -Men

and I thought

that was the best part

why didn’t you like

the movies?

they weren’t very good

I just

I think

I think when they have

a massive ensemble

cast

you don’t

form a connection

to any

any one of them

so if you didn’t

already know those characters

you did not give a shit

about those characters

I gave a shit

about the characters Peter

but you already knew them right?

you just said

you were already

into the X -Men

so that’s my point

like

no I wasn’t already

into that

I’m just

no no no

I said

I was into them

like from the movies

oh from the movies

which X -Men

did you like?

oh I loved

Mystique and Storm

I do like them as well

yeah

I mean but that’s just

because I would

like to do them

yeah

that’s why I’m going

yeah

I mean that’s

I think

it would be really fun

yeah

my base

for liking them

is pretty

fundamental

I don’t know

that’s it

yeah one track

speaking of Mystique

if you know

she’d probably be

the best partner

to have

because

by dating Mystique

you’re dating everyone

everyone that she can see

she’s transforming to

which actually

as I’m saying it

is very problematic

because

that’s

taking

the image of somebody

without letting them know

which

I do not endorse

well in the bedroom

in the bedroom

it would just count as like

dressing up or cosplay or something

but I

I would

I wonder if Mystique

would have an issue with it

where you’re like

hey could you be this tonight

so it’s

do you like Mystique

or do you like

that you can have the variety

I think there would always be that doubt

absolutely

because the scene

the scene

she’s in the bed

and she’s changing into

sexy ladies for some guy

I remember this scene really well

and he’s like

no no I want you

and then she changes into her

like blue form

and he’s like perfect

and I was like

oh there you go

that’s the right guy

that’s awesome yeah

I did like that part

he was like

I don’t

I don’t want

the fake stuff

you’re putting out there

for the world

I want you

I was like

oh

nice

I don’t remember

if he was a good guy or not

well

he was

nice and

sensitive to her needs

and her feelings

in that moment anyway

so

who was your favourite

ex -person

because you named two

but that’s not

if you had to pick one

I really

I really like

what’s his face

I think he’s called Angel

ah yes

yes

he’s one of the

huge wings

yeah

it’s not a skill I would like

if I was one of the

mutants

I wouldn’t

I wouldn’t choose that one

over anything else

but I just like his story

how you get flashbacks of it

I don’t remember him being

a major character in the movies

that I watched

but

you had flashbacks of him

trying to clip his own wings

in the toilet

as a kid

because

he was

being bullied for

or something like that

and then

his dad thought

he was a monster

but then he ends up

saving his dad

using the power

that is that always

kind of

denied

and so

yeah

that was just a nice

little story arc

very predictable story arc

it was

I think it was in

one of the movies

where the dad is like

in a company

that’s creating a drug

that will repress

the mutant gene

and then

he wants to give it

to his son

and his son decides

he doesn’t want it

but do you think

the son has

hollow bones

because birds have hollow bones

to keep them light enough

to fly

so he must have hollow bones

which would make him

very fragile

well

scientifically speaking

yeah he must do

but yeah

he can’t really fight

that way

especially when

there’s these

superpower

strength mutants

they’re obliterating

wouldn’t they

yeah

no I

I always wondered

like

how much thought

they put into it

because he looks awesome

big hunky dude

blonde hair

big wings

I understand

but did anyone

take any time

to go like

but

you know

for him to be able to fly

he has to be

essentially very fragile

or super fast

I guess if he could be

super fast

no one could hit him

but you hit him once

he’d probably die

no that’s right

it would be like

punching a pigeon

and if you’ve ever

punched a pigeon

it’s super fun

let us know

in the comments

if you have punched a pigeon

let us know

send an email

to chunklebeefchest

at gmail .com

or speakpipe .com

slash chunklebeefchest

if you’ve punched a pigeon

or if there are any pigeons

listening

have you been punched

by a human

have you heard of

cuteness aggression

no

oh

cuteness aggression

is the

I think mostly

harmless

effect we have

in our brains

if we see something cute

it brings out

some kind of

very light

aggressive impulse

that’s

you squeeze

cute things

or we say

oh

do you know

do you know what I mean

you see something cute

maybe you clench your fist

a little bit

or you squeeze

your dog a little

maybe a little tight

then the dog

wouldn’t like you to

if you’ve ever experienced

that it’s called

cute aggression

I probably shouldn’t

put this

out in the world

but yeah

like if

cute girls

I like to like

push them around

wow

there’s tiny Japanese girls

like they’re adults

but they’re like tiny

and I like to like

shove them a little bit

well

you should stop that

yeah no

I

it’s an instinct

that I

I absolutely put effort

into repressing

but if like

I have a friend

who’s tiny

yeah like

picking them up

and throwing them around

and stuff

yeah it’s really satisfying

that is

oh god

that is

that’s gross

now that I say it

well that was

in the comments

if Peter’s ever

pushed you around

it’s not gonna be comments

it’s gonna be

a class action lawsuit

we found out

there’s 50 of us

we can sue them

and get a ton of money

except he’s poor

so we’re not getting

any money

we’re gonna take away

his 30 ,000 yen microphone

that makes his voice

sound better

30 ,000

crikey

well it

that’s why you say

okay

so this microphone

it’s the Shure microphone

and it’s because

podcasting and recording stuff

and making stuff

for the internet

it’s a hobby

so this is the

one of the few things

I put money into

because I’d bought

a really cheap one

to see if I was gonna do it

and then I bought a better one

and then I was like

I might as well

buy a good one

and just leave it at that

but when I got it

and plugged it into the computer

it had settings

and it had

make your voice

like

radio friendly

and then deeper

and softer

and then a little higher pitch

for more excitement

like the microphone

will focus in on

tones in your voice

wow

so I think

I’ve got it on

sexy sultry

I see

so that’s why it sounds

different and or better

than when we were talking

on the phone

you definitely have it

on sexy sultry

yeah where it’s like

on the phone

it’s really high pitched

and squeaky

and awful

you must have set mine

to

I don’t know

little girl

at school

voice

because that’s what I sound like

have you ever

actively tried to change

your voice

kind of for social reasons

or what not

I

okay

I used to laugh

a lot

and

I had sort of

a high pitch laugh

and it still happens

but I was

in high school

I was at my girlfriend’s

play

watching it

it was a

it was a funny thing

it was like a pantomime

almost

and so I laughed a lot

and they had recorded

the play

and then all the people

in the play

started making fun

of my laugh

and I basically

stopped laughing

after that

is that tragic

yeah it’s tragic

that’s tragic

so my girlfriend

thought this was very funny

haha

all my friends

were making fun

of your laugh

and then I don’t know

like I just stopped

laughing after that

so I laugh a lot less

than I did

when I was young

oh

that’s awful

it’s okay

laughing is involuntary

no one chooses it

I would never make fun

of someone’s laugh

because

then what

they’re gonna do

stop laughing

like you’ve just said

yep

oh

it’s alright

I don’t mind

I only cry a little

a bit at night

get over it

yep

no I already have

okay so last time

last time

you told me

a story

about the leaf

and I have been

obsessed with this story

since we spoke

this

so

okay

imagine

imagine this

okay so it’s

you go to the movies

and you sit down

and it’s black screen

it fades in

and you have

gentle

English village

sort of

maybe

a crane shot

sweeping over the village

to show that it’s

sort of quiet

and calm

and then there’s

sort of a gust of wind

and maybe a few leaves

not

it’s because it’s not

a dirty town

so there’s a few leaves

rustle through

and then it

the camera pans down

to a road

and there’s

a boy

in his school uniform

short pants

and he’s not skipping

but he’s

he’s walking

with a jaunt

and then

as he walks down

the street

he’s maybe even

humming a little

English song

like English rose

or something

and then

he gets to the corner

and then he turns

and suddenly

the giant black habit

of a nun

is looming over him

now I haven’t decided

if it should be

like a beautiful

porcelain face

to contrast the habit

or like an old

wizened face

to make it seem

more witch like

so that would be

something we need

to like maybe

test with audiences

yeah

she

she looks down

at the little boy

and reaches out

her hand

and he puts

just instinctively

because she’s a nun

puts his hand in hers

and she takes the leaf out

she puts it in

and then

she pushes it

and he sort of feels

that there’s that hard bit

in the middle

so he touches it

with his thumb

and it pierces his thumb

and a little drop of blood

goes into it

and then the blood

gets sucked into the leaf

which turns

sort of a different color

and then

I’m trying to get it

to decide

either it turns to ash

and blows away

or it absorbs

into his hand

and then

the nun disappears

I know

I know

like I’ve taken the story

you told me

and I’ve just like

I’ve started building

a mythology around it

you have

I also worked

in a joke

I also worked in a joke

if you want

so she puts it in his hand

and she goes

you’re gay now

and that’s how

young boys become

gay men

but

it is a choice

but it’s not our choice

it’s the nun’s choice

I didn’t want to make

that joke at first

but I was like

oh that’d actually be funny

if the curse

was actually just

you’re now

a gay boy

but

every aspect

of that story

is the beginning

of a horror movie

to me

and like you told it

it was almost innocent

well that’s

because I was experiencing it

I didn’t think anything of it

but as an outsider

when you

when you kind of

not this instance

where it’s all dramatic

but in the last

last conversation

you did say

how weird it was

and I kind of

yeah

I think you’re right

you see it now though

yeah

I do

I do

and then if we put

like it was all

sort of gentle

harmonious music

little

not even upbeat

but just you know

gentle and

pipes and stuff

for the English countryside

and then when the nun

puts the leaf in your hand

it gets into like

trilling

trilling violins

like

yeah

yes

I know exactly

what you mean

yeah

it’s a horror movie

from that point on

you said

she kind of whispered

you’re gay now

however

the audience

having previously seen

the jauntily way

I was walking

thinking

yeah we know

especially if I am skipping

well

it was

it was just one of those things

where I was like

there’s a joke in there

I don’t know if it’s okay

for me to make her nuts

I don’t know if I should

but it was just

the idea of the voice

it was just the really gentle

really quiet

you’re gay now

would just be really

really funny

but then

but then

it is the point

the only decision

left to be made

is

does the boy

become the horror

or is it like a curse

and all the horror things

happen to the boy

so I haven’t

that would be the next part

because then events

have to start occurring

in more increasing

you know

seriousness

exactly yes

and also

that would also

answer your question

of either being absorbed

into the skin

or being blown away

as ash

because if it was

happening from within me

then I should absorb it

yes

if it was happening

to me

it should be the ash

the ash

yeah it goes out

into the air

and the atmosphere

around you

yeah

yeah no that’s right

that’s pretty good

that’s great

okay

actually I had

an idea

to talk about

that this kind of

brings into

because you’ve kind of

reshaped

and reframed

my memory

of this story now

and actually

I think

now that you say it

that’s when I

I did

become gay

yeah

that was

the exact point

but

I would love

I would love

if I

because I only have

a few gay friends

because I

you can only have

so many friends

in Japan

but like

I thought you were

going to say

if you can only

deal with so much

gay people

okay so

I have

I have

one of my friends

who’s gay

we

spend a lot of time

online together

so he’s sending

memes

he has

so harshly

altered my

algorithm

that every

company that

collects that

information thinks

I’m gay

because he’s

always sending

me like

buff dudes

flexing their

butt in a

bikini

in the camera

he’s sending

me like

and I like

watching it

I’m just not

into it for

the same reasons

I’m always just

like oh that’s

fascinating

as an outsider

but

companies must

think I’m

closeted

they must

do

yeah

maybe

anyway

sorry

do the

companies

think you’re

a top

or a bottom

that’s what

I want to

know

oh you’ve

opened a

door you

maybe shouldn’t

have opened

so I have

this as again

as an outsider

is it

acceptable

for me

in a

conversation

to ask

if you’re

a top

or bottom

when I’m

not

trying to

participate

so just

as a query

of interest

because I’m

interested in

you

so I don’t

want it to

sound malicious

but like

let’s say

you and I

are just

talking

and I

find out

you’re

gay

and I’m

not gay

and I just

go are you

a top

or a bottom

is that

rude or not

I’d say

if we don’t

know each

other so much

or haven’t

had a rapport

established

it does get

my back up

because

I’ve been

asked that

before

by

I was once

introduced

to the

friend

of a

very good

friend

of mine

so the

very good

friend

he can

say

whatever

he wants

I’m

fine

but his

friends

I think

especially

in England

I’m

very easily

clockable

as gay

so they

kind of

picked up

on that

and then

they asked

kind of

sheepishly

are you

a top

or a bottom

and that

just got

my back

up straight

away

because

I didn’t

know

more than

one thing

about each

of them

and

that’s

what they

want to

know

so

that

I thought

I just

kind of

replied

with a bit

of a joke

because I

didn’t want

to make

the situation

awkward

because

like I

said

I’ve

got my

good friend

that was

there

but

I thought

that’s

you don’t

need to

know

because

we’re not

we’re not

gonna

we’re not

gonna do

it

that’s right

so

because in

my head

it’s like

it’s clearly

none of my

business

but

should we

have a

conversation

later

maybe that

would be

valuable

information

so I

was like

I know

I’m pretty

sure

it’s not

okay

but let’s

say we

become

friends

later

it might

be worth

knowing

because

I

could be

your

wingman

right

and it’s

like I

know

so if

you and

I were

hanging

out

we live

in different

cities so we

don’t get to

hang out

but let’s

say we’re

hanging out

and okay

I don’t

know if

we’re where

we are

but there’s

a guy

and he’s

kind of

I would

need to

know what

you’re

into to

be to

be to

help you

with that

situation

well in

that situation

I can see

I can see

your logic

yeah

yeah but

I think that

actually answers

my question

which I if I’d

really thought

about it I

could have

figured out

where’s like

you have to

have more

rapport and

more of a

relationship

before that

comes up

that’s

important

I think

that’s

pretty fair

because you

would never

go to a

straight person

and go like

do you like

your penis

or something

because

yeah

I can’t

there’s no

equivalency

to a

hetero couple

no I know

what you mean

just from the

what you’re

doing with

them and

stuff but

yeah

it’s like

if a

complete

stranger

like the

situation

I said

if in

that

situation

I’m also

thinking

for a start

they’ve asked

me and they

don’t know

anything about

me but

also what’s

the intention

beyond the

question because

there are

certain

perceptions

that somebody

who just

maybe if you

don’t know

so many gay

people there

are certain

perceptions and

stereotypes

that you’d

rely on

given you

knew if

they were

top or

bottom

so

typically

if a guy

said oh

he’s a

bottom he’s

probably a

bit girly

a bit femme

that’s a

stereotype and

it’s not always

true

or they might

think oh he’s a

top he’s a bit

of a foot boy

or whatever

I don’t know

the stereotypes

that somebody

might think

if they’re not

in that world

I don’t want

to assign any

stereotypes to

me based on

the answer I

give

I’m also

thinking about

that

yeah

but having a

rapport and

laugh with

somebody that

that kind of

really alleviates

this tension

around the

question so

I’ve been asked

many times by

people I’ve been

fine to answer

because I when I

had a son when

when my wife was

pregnant and I

remember talking to

a group and there

was this really

like party dude

and he clearly was

not comfortable with

his sexuality yet

really he was

very like

heteronormative and

and he was like

what if your son’s

gay and I

because I think I

had made a joke

earlier it was like

you know he’s

gonna be good

looking and tall

and have all the

attributes he’s

gonna be drowning

in pussy I

probably made a

joke like that

and then the

guy’s like what

if he’s gay and

he was trying to

make it I think

he was testing the

water to see if

we shared the

same feeling like

oh that’s a

scary world and

we don’t want a

part of it and I

just said oh well

then he’d be just

like slobbering

cock because he’s

still gonna have all

the positive

attributes that make

him attractive to

other people and I

want him to be

happy so if he’s

straight or gay I

do not care

I just want him

to get as much

as he can which

he’s really

disappointed me with

if I’m being honest

he just hasn’t

gotten any like it’s

interesting he’s all

the people are like

straight or gay is

the issue I’m like

no he’s not getting

any so the

disappointment here

is is strong because

when I was his age

that’s all I wanted

to do was try to get

as much as I could

and I’m like I he

hasn’t gotten my

hormones or my

drive or something

he’s missing something

that I had and it’s

the reason that

Japan’s population is

dropping

well not if he was

gay that wouldn’t

affect it would it

yeah but at least

he’d be active

yeah

oh your poor son

it’s funny because the

pressure that different

parents put on their

kids and I’m like why

aren’t you getting

any

I think this is a

more common pressure

than than we assume

I think a lot of

dads even if they’re

kind of maybe um

bit outwardly

more conservative

reaction maybe

inside the thing

they’re thinking

get it yeah

yeah yeah I think

that’s pretty true

I never could or

whatever

yeah because when

he graduated high

school and they’re

all taking pictures

together there was

like a line of

little high school

girls who wanted to

take their picture

with him before he

left and I was like

I would have

exploited that

situation so hard

but I think that

might be why I

wasn’t that successful

because I would have

been come across as

relatively desperate

where he because he

doesn’t seem to be

particularly interested

in anyone that’s

attractive

beliefness is very

attractive yeah

yeah it’s yeah I

wish I’d known that

in our history

yeah he does have

that because he’s

just empty this is

why beautiful dumb

people are so

attractive is because

you think there’s

something in there

when there isn’t

well that’s the

mystery it’s like

oh what’s he feeling

and then if you

actually went into

his head it’d be

like an echo chamber

of like blah blah blah

blah blah blah blah

blah blah blah

like if you solve

the mystery it’d be

the most disappointing

moment of your life

there is there’s

something endearing

about maybe how

do I wear it maybe

like a visual cue

of or a tangible

cue of somebody’s

maybe lack of

knowledge there is

something endearing

about that that’s

why pigeons are

so stupid because

I think they’ve

evolved to become

less intelligent to

garner some kind of

pity or attention

from the humans

that now feed

them and continue

their survival

well because I

read that baby

animals they have

like big eyes and

they’re super cute

and that’s so that

in certain situations

hopefully there’s a

chance that a

predator will not

eat them it might

take them under their

wing because they’ve

had when a lion

chases away or

kills the leader of a

pride they tend to

kill all the babies

but evolutionarily

speaking that’s

you that’s what you

want to have happen

because you only want

your seed to be

passed on but if

they’re cute enough

you might take pity

on them and then

that will help that

line survive a little

bit and so that was

one of the reasons

baby animals are so

cute is because

they’re they need to

be protected

no I see what you

mean I see what you

mean so yeah it’s

it must be some kind

of evolutionary tactic

well we we’re born

to like I think big

eyes and stuff like

that is inherent we

are designed to

believe that’s

attractive cute not

attractive

god damn

to find that

you are incriminating

yourself on this

well that was that

was I meant

attractive but not

in the way it would

come across

I took it in the

way that you meant

it

I meant I meant

an appealing

characteristic the

problem is again

because of my job I

talk so much I have

to listen to what I

say to make sure I

don’t say something

that could be

misinterpreted so as

I’m saying stuff

sometimes I’m like

well that’s not the

right way to phrase

that gotta gotta

rephrase that one

before I finish this

sentence yeah

don’t know any of

those complaints

coming through yeah

like but attractive is

an appealing traits

that humans find like

so that’s why like our

babies we find big

heads so it’s not

like the baby’s the

baby looks like that

and we’re genetically

programmed to believe

that’s cute have

you ever seen an

ugly baby absolutely

yeah yeah do you

what do you say

you just go oh

in my opinion because

I’m not a baby person

um I’ve my ratio I’ve

seen more uglies than

cutes it’s again I

think I think the

parents are genetically

triggered to think

their babies are cute

my wife when my son

was a baby so still in

like a pram uh she

was out and then this

other lady got on the

same elevator and she

looked over and looked

at because they always

look at each other’s

babies they’re comparing

but then this mother

that we didn’t know

had no relationship

with just looks at

her baby and goes

you lose oh that’s

awful I know I know

and my wife was like

horrified and happy

because like she just

admitted that our baby

was cuter than her

baby but also it’s like

don’t say that yeah

that’s that’s kind of

scratching scratching

maybe like a motherly

ego but also the

motherly instinct to

protect the children

and she’s kind of

scared she’d be yeah

okay you lose but

Japanese society when

it comes to like uh

body shaming and stuff

is just so blatant it’s

terrifying it’s I’ve

noticed physical traits

are kind of dealt with

more practically less

less sensitively than

we do in the west it’s

just everything’s a joke

if it’s not if you’re

not so like I’m I’ve

been losing my hair a

little bit for maybe

the last 10 years

pretty normal um but

now now it’s basically

the good bits are gone

so I basically shave it

all the way down but

if I want to make a

group of Japanese

people laugh I just say

I’m losing my hair not

even a joke like there’s

no setup or anything I

just go I’m losing my

hair they will start

laughing and I’m I

think that’s the

weirdest thing ever I

was like that’s like I

didn’t even make a joke

I just said a fact I’m

losing my hair and they

just burst out laughing

laughing that’s really

funny it’s messed up

it is messed up because

it’s because when you

can’t say the joke you

have to assume that

they’re just laughing at

this misfortune that’s

before when you yes

yeah which isn’t nice

is it I had a I had a

it was my first or

second year in Japan so

like 2002 maybe and I

had one of those like

they were like 14 year

old girls it was like

six girls in this class

together and they just

despised me and I I

didn’t know I hadn’t

done anything yet like

this was literally day

one they’re like ew and

I was like okay I don’t

I I want it so I spend a

lot of time trying to be

friendly and nice and

there was it was it was a

ringleader one girl and I

went to the the staff at

the school and I was like

this girl she seems to

hate me and they go oh

yeah she doesn’t like men

and I was like oh I what

do I do with that I’m I

can’t fix that but she

really wanted to hurt my

feelings which I that is

also quite funny but she

really wanted to hurt my

feelings so she goes up to

the whiteboard she goes you

are m and I was like what

like I was like she’s

saying I’m a masochist but

I didn’t want to like open

that door either so she

goes you are m and I’m

like I don’t I don’t know

what that means she puts an

m on the board on the

whiteboard I’m like okay

she goes you are m and I’m

like I don’t still that

doesn’t make any sense so

then she put eyes in a

mouth under the m and she

was talking about my

hairline because I had I

had like a widow’s peak so

she had she she made an m

shape for my hairline and

said you are m and she

was just waiting for me to

break down and I thought

it was very funny

doing that what why would

she want to break you down

like that because you hate

somebody just hate them

like attacking you yeah

high school girls are mean

like they’re just the

psychological warfare like

they should study that

because they they will go

for your weakness at the

time I’ve never been

particularly self -conscious

about losing my hair so

it’s not a big deal I

would rather not but I

don’t care like it

doesn’t bother me so it

didn’t hurt my feelings I

thought it was a very

funny joke so I started

laughing really hard and

you could see that she was

she felt defeated she was

like this was supposed to

be the one that broke him

and I was like no man that

was a good joke way to go

I mean if she tried on

someone else it might have

broken them but yeah yeah

on a different person it

actually would have been

really hurtful because I

yeah so I made a proposal

for a course and it was a

business course and of

course I had to put some

fake charts that we would

maybe be studying in the

class so one of the charts

I made was Peter’s hair

over time and it started

at zero and then it went

up and then it hit this

kind of peak and then it

started going down and

then there was like a

predictive part where it’s

like is going to go down

to zero or is it we’re

going to find like a cure

for baldness and it goes

back up again and it was

just oh yeah it was just a

very like throwaway joke

but it’s like here would be a

chart with fake information

that we would then discuss

with the clock the guy who

had to approve the project

was losing his hair and was

deeply offended by this joke

and refused my proposal is

what I was told oh my goodness

so I realized you can’t you

can’t put jokes in anything

like you want actually taken

seriously in a business

situation because yeah it drew

attention to something he was

self -conscious about he’s like

I hate this so that means that

the the self -conscious part of

him is driving his thoughts he

can’t kind of see if it was me

I would imagine this chart with

any other topic being displayed

the topic doesn’t matter to what

the proposal is isn’t it yeah

well I was just filling in a

blank space it could have just

said chart but yeah I was like

I’ll make a chart and then oh

here’s an opportunity for me to

like maybe because it wasn’t his

hair over time it was my hair like

I literally was making fun of

myself exactly yeah but he he

just couldn’t handle it hit a

nerve yeah well yeah again so

like I realized like I started

telling my students my students

like I will make jokes about

losing my hair but if you meet

another western person it could be

really sensitive so don’t do it

so I like I realized like the

cultural aspect of teaching is

sometimes like what is okay and

not okay to make fun of is

actually a really big deal because

yeah fat shaming on TV is a

really big thing in Japan I mean

that it is that bugs me and I’m

not even like out of shape that

much I mean and it’s also in

daylife you’ll see businesses but

businesses that kind of to a

western standard insensitively

named depending on what body type

they’re catering to whether it’s

plus size or whether it’s skinny

sizes yeah yeah it’s it’s not the

note don’t have any punches over

here do they Asia is pretty

hardcore when it comes to body

there was a trend on the

internet where everyone was like

crapping on cultural appropriation

and there was some little white

girl and she wanted to have like a

kimono Japanese tea ceremony and

all these all these it was always

western people saying like that’s

horrible and then all these

Japanese people were like no we

really like that she wanted to do

this thing and then there was this

girl wearing a Chinese dress and

all these other people all these

white people in the west were like

it’s cultural appropriation she

shouldn’t be allowed to wear that

dress and they went to China and

said like what do you think and

they’re all like oh she lost a

couple pounds it’d look great

so I was like it was it was it was

it was a whole different way of

looking at the exact same thing

which was real cultural insight as

to what was important to them

because they were like in China

cultural appropriation is not a

thing it’s a great dress she needs

to fit it

yeah do the dress justice

that’s um yeah this is something I’ve

seen on the internet um cultural

appropriation I’m sure that many

communities or some communities it

can be harmful but a lot of the

videos I’ve seen reactionary videos

the culture that’s supposedly been

appropriated doesn’t seem to have an

issue with it no no that there was a

couple videos that came out

yeah there were a couple videos that

came out and it was like purposefully

like I’m going to make a

stereotypical the one I saw was

Mexican so sombrero and fake mustache

and all these people were saying all

these people at a university were

saying it’s horrible and they went to

Mexico and they’re like oh yeah it’s

funny it’s great like they had they

loved it

yeah hmm and all the reactions I think

in a video like that you can cherry

pick the ones you’re going to show

can’t you

oh they must be

people that were reacting positively

yeah they seemed pretty happy about it

about um if even if it was a bit of a

cartoonish display of the culture it was

a display I don’t know um they seemed

happy that there was some kind of um

mingling of cultures sharing them

yeah I was like you what was your

topic that you brought up oh yeah you

brought up a you have a topic like 30

minutes ago yeah but then but then we

went on to the horror movie yeah and

you you told me the plot twist yeah I

was going to say um have you ever seen

those videos online that take all the

music out of the original medium media

and then they switch it with something

else or they leave it blank just to show

you how either messed up or how um

different to the original atmosphere

this video is well for example um have

you seen the movie Mrs Doubtfire yes

Ron Williams um this is a movie I’d say

just to harp on about something we talked

about before this would be if somebody my

age hadn’t seen this movie I’d be quite

surprised um but Mrs Doubtfire is a comedy

movie about a guy who is I think

divorced separated from his wife and

isn’t in a great position where he can

see his kids a lot so he um gets help to

transform himself using um prosthetics

and just general acting into an old lady

and he poses as the perfect nanny for

his kids and his ex -wife and his kids

can’t recognize him as their dad because

he’s a good actor he’s good at pretending

to be a lady and it’s built up as this

heartwarming comedy um oh what’s he like

kind of kind of movie but taking all the

music and all the comedy beats out of the

trailer and replacing it with typical

thriller -esque design and makeup it looks

it looks really frightening how he’s um he’s

coercing people into kind of believing he’s

somebody he’s not and it’s a really good kind

of change of atmosphere have you ever seen

anything like that I’ve seen stuff like that

I’ve seen stuff where they swap out the music

for yeah like a light -hearted movie for heavy

music and then it’s but if you just a lot of

movies especially comedy movies if you just

take the actual premise and like say it out

loud so mrs doubtfire you have a man who

disguises himself to infiltrate his separated

wife’s home without her knowing so he can

spend time with the kids he’s not allowed to

see like that’s horrible that’s the premise

of the film that is a guy who should be

arrested should be put in you know clearly

shouldn’t be around kids if he’s willing to

do this like that this is all insane stuff and

I believe at the end of mrs doubtfire they get

back together again I don’t remember it was

been too long that wouldn’t happen in real

life though no you would find out that this

guy disguised himself and came into your

house you would have him arrested and like

a restraining order immediately yes yeah so

yeah we should maybe we should do that like

go away for a couple weeks try to find some

comedy movies and just like write the premise

of the film or write the premise of the film

see if you can guess what movie it is and then

decide is it a horror movie is it like a

thriller is it a comedy movie yeah yeah

describe them as air bones as possible

revenge of the nerds was a movie I grew up

with which is a terrible tear it would not

have aged well but the the climax of the

movie is oh it’s got like really bad racist

jokes and stuff in which I guess were funny

in the 80s and 90s but not they wouldn’t

make it now you wouldn’t even be allowed to

put it on the screen it’s always changing

yeah yeah but the end of the I think the

first movie this girl the head cheerleader

has sex with what she thinks is her

boyfriend but he’s wearing a Darth Vader

Darth Vader mask and it turns out to be the

nerd and it’s okay because he’s so good at

sex no that’s awful right my goodness this is

sexual assault this is just straight up

sexual assault it absolutely is and but and

she’s like how are you so good he’s like

jocks only think about sports and nerds

only think about having sex and I was like

no you just sexually assaulted that woman

like she should be terrified and horrified

and you should go to jail now yes absolutely

but this is the climax of a comedy film in

the 80s oh my goodness well yeah

oh crikey yeah mrs doubtfire the premise

of that film like if you just if you came

into a studio exec’s office and they said

like well here’s my elevator pitch man

dresses up like a woman so that he can get

into his ex -wife’s house so he can spend

more time with the kids he’s not allowed

to see and they’d be like oh yeah thriller

movie and they like fight at the end it’s

like no they get back together because it’s a

comedy yeah we’re on we’re on the guy side

for the entire movie yeah yeah we really

want him to succeed at this there was a

youtube video that analyzed all the crimes

that are committed in mrs doubtfire by the

by the character and um and based on the

laws in the time that this movie is set

um he estimates how what the consequences

are how much prison time has this guy um

accumulated through all the actions in the

movie and it’s i think maybe it’s

substantial oh i know yeah because a long

time because every instance of him coming

into the house is probably illegal because

they’re separated he’s not supposed to be in

that house he’s not supposed to be around

those kids that’s it’s a separate crime like

yeah yeah you’re stacking endangerment you’re

stacking crimes and it’s i guess probably also

fraud because he’s pretending to be someone he

isn’t so he can get a job like beyond just the like

that that’s that’s fraud and he probably has said

he’s he’s a nanny so he’s like falsified his

background yeah and there’s so much

there’s scenes where he there’s some chaos at a restaurant

i think that that actually um has lawsuits involved as well

yeah yeah it’s been too long since i’ve seen it so i don’t remember but i

actually it would be pretty easy to go through and be like yeah he should be

in prison for like the next decade

because this is fascinating what yeah i’m trying to think of any comedy movies

i’ve seen recently i haven’t watched a lot of comedy lately

but most of them have like a lot of its couple stuff and so the couple

stuff is always really shady because it’s funny

because it’s ludicrous because it shouldn’t happen but it shouldn’t happen

probably because it’s illegal yeah and we see we see these two characters on

screen reacting kind of whimsically to what’s happening it kind of it lets us

slide by all the problematic stuff pretty easily as we’re watching unless you’re

particularly astute to it but re -watching stuff with a with a with a

with a new eye that’s that’s with a critical mindset yeah i haven’t i haven’t

yeah because when you watch the movie you’re not thinking about it you’re just

like following the story but exactly you went back and be like okay

i’m gonna like critically see because in action movies there’s a lot of times

where you’re killing security guards and stuff who are essentially innocent

and i’m like absolutely when you’re killing bad guys and gang members and

stuff okay within the movie premise it’s fine because they’re bad people

just inherently but i’m like you know not all of them actually are bad

they’re just in a tough situation but yeah sometimes they’re going into like a

building and i’m like that security officer had a family and he didn’t do

anything he’s been hired by an evil company it’s not his fault everyone’s

hired by an evil company like i’m working for an evil company exactly

yeah it’s very very true everyone’s working for an evil company you can’t get

away from that part so some guy comes in and like shoots me is that okay because

i wanted to support my family it’s actually not okay but they never

it’s never important to explain this in the movie’s plot so it’s not but have you seen what

they oh i forget which austin power movie it is they address this exact um exact point

um have you seen austin powers i’ve seen yes yes well in this movie whichever one it is

um this stuff happens austin powers the international spy goes in saves a bunch of people

kills a bunch of henchmen and it cuts away to a nice suburban house of a mother child

just enjoying pancakes um the sun’s shining through the window she gets a call so her husband’s been

killed and they it’s a very fourth wall breaking they’re all they’re both sobbing and saying oh

it’s been crushed by uh what was the death i think it was a steamroller death there was a steamroller

death that is extended because it’s moving really slow yeah yeah that was that was a really memorable

scene yeah the joke that was that he could easily have moved out of the way and so they make it they

make it last for about two minutes yeah yeah well this guy’s family um are weeping over his death

saying oh no one ever thinks about the security cards families or i can’t believe what she says but

it’s the gist of what you’re saying yeah well the the joke i saw that really brought it home for me

was like you’re playing a any any sort of shooter and then he was like i would like games to sort of

sort of overlap and so like you you play a shooter and you kill a bunch of people because that’s what

you do in a shooter but then you’re driving you’re playing a driving game a racing game later and the

audience you see the son of one of the men you killed oh it doesn’t make sense it’s just so okay

it’s just a joke he’s like so you’re playing call of duty and you kill a man yeah and then the next

game you play is let’s say a driving game a racing game and in the audience is the son of the man you

killed so you suck yeah he’s like he’s really angry at you he hates he’s really anti whatever

you whatever you’re playing in that game but he’s you’ve i was like actually as a premise that’s

really interesting that you could have like effects roll over into other games is that possible could

they do that uh if you owned both ips you could try to and then if you could track people’s memory

cards yes you could actually do something like that because i would love that to be a thing

metal gear solid would read your memory card and then say so it was like an interrogation scene

and he was like oh you’ve played a lot of final fantasy like and he’s talking to you the player

not you the character in the game because the game read your memory card to see what games you’d

played the most time on it it couldn’t give you any details but like it always keeps track of how

much time and so it would pick one of the one of the games you’ve played the most like maybe the top

two and the character would look around if he had the voice line for that be like oh yeah you’ve played

a lot of tekken oh yeah that’s that’s um that’s a really good idea that’s that’ll creep me out if i if i

if i heard that i was gonna say what’s what’s a really random like embarrassing game it could

mention you’ve played a lot of um barbie’s wonderland

but what would be like a all the games have trophies and achievements and stuff now and then so there was

uh near automata the main character had a short skirt and if she climbed up ladders players would

try to get the the camera under her skirt but she would actually swipe the camera away but if you did

that x amount of times you got a trophy for it like you know bad boy kind of thing and then in

the yakuza games if you what there was one of the games where you could go to this thing where you

called girls on the phone and if you could get them excited enough like you would essentially

masturbate and then you got a trophy for that and it was a really embarrassing trophy name like it was

one you kind of didn’t want to get and there’s so there’s been a bunch of games like lollipop chainsaw had

the same thing where you could try to look up the main character’s skirt and she would kick you away

but a game could look at the trophy list and go you’ve gotten this trophy you dirty dirty boy

yeah they’d know exactly what you have to do to get that as well because it is it is

explicit as to what you had to do to get the trophy i do like these strange very specific trophies i do

like um reading about them there’s obviously there’s like the generic ones oh you completed level five

or whatever yeah milestone trophies but yeah but um but i do like the really odd

you either have to do this by accident or research how to do it because i’ll generally i don’t care

about trophies but i do read the trophy list and i saw the near automata one for looking up her skirt

and i hadn’t looked up her skirt yet so i actually just wanted to see like what does she do so she like

hides her she holds her skirt down so you can’t see up it or she’ll like slap the camera and the camera

will like fly away and then come back um but then i was like oh if you do this 10 times you get this

trophy i was like well i’ve done two might as well finish that one as well so i did i got that trophy

i got the yakuza trophy for essentially masturbating in a booth oh crikey yeah it was pretty funny

i mean just i think it’s a game is it voice acted yeah oh yeah yeah the they always they always they

always have these so so they always have these like weird mini games like there was this one that

happened in sort of old japan and i have a video of it that i can send you after but it’s it’s you

have to drink with a prostitute but this is like a high class one because it’s the edo period so it’s

like a geisha so you drink with her and if you get her drunk enough you play rock paper scissors and

if you win rock paper scissors she starts taking off her clothes and then you have a mini game which is

your character flying around but you’re trying to avoid all the stressful stuff and if you get far

enough you make her orgasm oh crikey it is one of the weirdest ways because you never see anything

like there’s sexy top down shot of down her her decolletage kind of thing but you don’t see any

actual sex it’s but it’s all like this weird implied stuff which made it way funnier yeah yeah

brikey okay it’s a bit one -sided though isn’t it well you see her decolletage that is decolletage

oh he he gets his shirt off you you uh as as the character as the character who’s flying through the

like the bullet hell of stressful things which is also very funny he’s he’s just wearing the

traditional japanese like white sheet underwear and he’s really built oh i see like the whole point

of this character is he’s really really built so you there’s a little bit there for you i mean again i

think the people who make it are kind of heteronormative is the word but yeah but they

still put in a little bit for you know maybe the ladies or other people playing the game yeah fair

enough i always make a big deal when he takes off his shirt i’m like god damn yeah because they rip off

his shirt and show his tattoo every game every big fight every boss fight he takes off his shirt

and it’s awesome okay it’s like intimidation it’s it’s funny because he’s wearing a button

down shirt with a collar but he like pulls it from the side and just rips the whole thing off like it’s

a tear away maybe he’s maybe he’s rigged it himself so he can have that dramatic moment almost a joke in

the game because there was one guy wearing like a shirt tie and jacket and he pulled it off in one go

to take off so he’s just wearing topless but there’s nothing better than that nothing better

than sweaty men fighting and i don’t know how ironically you’re saying that no i i i actually

am on in both parts as a joke and seriously i am 100 on board excellent well we agree on that i can

appreciate no i can appreciate the male form and uh uh i also think it’s very funny that i i think it’s

because in my life i when i was young i was trying to be manly and then i kind of like hit the rubicon

where i’ve gone so far into the manliness that it’s actually funny like i do manly men things and

i know how stupid it is that i’m doing this but i’m still doing it like i’ll do that yeah but it’s

self -awareness yeah i know how dumb i am but i’m still doing it because it’s fun this um conversation

about the yakuza game it’s reminding me of um i seen a level from god of war which i never played

but um i know that there’s a sex kind of i have played game yes i’ve played all the god of wars

you’re talking about the first game where you is it aphrodite i think it’s there’s a series there’s

maybe it happens three times in the game maybe aphrodite might be the last one but it’s it’s you do just

bang some chicks i don’t remember if they’re gods or not but the mini game is essentially

if i remember correctly it’s like rolling the joystick and i think that’s supposed to be like

simulating motion and then every now and then pressing an x which might be like a power move

yeah okay because i remember there was some kind of button control whether it’s like a

um a rhythm based thing or whatever i don’t know what it would if it was rhythm based i would

not be good at it i’m terrible at rhythm based games just banging away at the x button well

unfortunately is what it would happen it’s too bad that is my my failure as a man is my complete

lack of rhythm well rhythm maybe is different for everybody maybe some people that people have

different songs so not every rhythm matches i just got to find someone who enjoys my song

my out of tune song exactly yeah there’s yeah i mean the better well mumble rap got popular and i

didn’t understand it at all not in again both senses but but i i was like this doesn’t sound good why do

people like this but people liked it so yeah there is someone out there who would think i i’m good at

my song i’ve never wait did you say mumble rap mumble rap it was uh five years ago it was really

big it was it was the guys were like i’m gonna i just oh no no i don’t know and you couldn’t

understand any of the words they were saying yeah yeah yeah i don’t know if they called it mumble rap

i know snoop dog was really ripping on mumble rappers he’s like i can’t understand what they’re saying

and it’s not original and they got no skill and i would be more of a snoop dog generation so i want to

be able to hear the words you’re saying and the complications and stuff so that it’s actually

impressive to me if you’re just like i’m gonna i’m gonna i’m gonna i’m gonna i’m gonna chunk my

but but that’s not skillful i suppose yeah maybe not as skillful as it could be that’s yeah i mean

i i could probably do a bit of mumble rap i think that might be the thing is everyone could do mumble

rap if you really yeah and that that’s why again i i didn’t enjoy it but it went away pretty quick i

i’m not surprised i’m surprised it lasted as long as it did but it went away pretty fast well maybe

maybe that kind of comment from snoop dog and maybe other people was quite damning maybe it

shortened the lifespan of it i actually think it it would have if someone big kind of discount

something a lot of people listen and react don’t they mumble rap is a subgenre of hip -hop that emerged

in the mid to late 2010s via soundcloud characterized by unclear enunciation heavy use of autotune and an

emphasis on melody mood and tone over complex lyricism the genre has faced significant criticism

from established rappers such as eminem j cole and logic who have argued that it lacks the lyrical

depth of traditional hip -hop this is i’ve gone into my announcer voice for you i hear that yeah

can you can you can you mumble rap this um explanation please prominent artists frequently

identified with this style and good future young thug amigos little lucy vert playboy cardi trevis scott

little pump extension it’s a bit clear yeah it’s too clear because i actually want you to hear what

i’m saying so it would have to be like uh okay so i’ll give i’ll do this sentence and then i’ll mumble

rap it so conversely defenders compare the style to the sonic simplicity of early punk or jazz scatting

viewing it as a natural progression in the genre’s evolution rather than a decline in quality

conversely definitive compared to the style of the sonic simplicity of early punk

that’s a bit better that’s the best i could do yeah but if you know what i’m saying and then you

cannot almost hear the words but you have to know what i’m saying for but that’s not the case in most

uh when when you’re a listener listen to this no i think the idea is not going to read the lyrics and

then listen to it i think the idea would be it’s not about what he’s saying it’s the mood of this like

the sound so it’s a sad song it’s a happy song it’s just vibes and so just the vibes for a lot of

people ended up again it’s a generational thing if you grew up with it you would think it was awesome

because it was your music but anyone younger or older than you might think it’s shit maybe but

but still if if it’s just about vibes i have a voice at all just these instrumentals yeah no i

i think i think that would be better like don’t use words yeah all right i think mumble rap yeah

mumble rap i mean it’s pretty shit

all the all the do you subscribe to that idea of like you if you’re not from that generation you

think that that that generation stuff is a crap i think because i like 80 stuff no i like i like i

think what happens is there’s music that is good and that will last longer so like again you just

said you like stuff some stuff from the 80s but i bet i could pull because i grew up in the 80s i bet

i could pull a lot of songs that i probably know all the words to and hate and you would think it was

terrible but there’s a group that grew up with it i have this idea that there’s always the song of the

summer for a group that’s 16 to 17 years old and that’s their song and if you actually look there’s

a song that’s produced every single year and it’s that summer song and it’s for that very small group

of people and they will always have it in their heart because it’s their song and so this is an

expansion of that if you’re in your teens you don’t want the music that came before and you don’t want

you want your music that is different and it doesn’t matter if it’s good it’s just different

so that you’re not listening to the same music as the people who came before you and so some of it

survives some of it doesn’t but mumble rap has no future because yeah like unless we keep it alive

well but if you’re if you’re thinking about like well because the 80s songs you’re referring to like

there’s like the depeche mode synth revolution there’s like duran duran pop music those genres became

relatively timeless and people updated them but the fundamentals were still there mumble rap

didn’t do that but i bet there’s like oh glam metal is an 80s thing that went away and so it’s

like all those heavy metal bands that were not quite heavy metal that still dressed with like

um really tight leather and like giant hair like the motley crew and stuff a lot of that went away

like what motley crew lasted longer than the other ones because they have a couple of good songs but

like poison no one who isn’t my age would know who poison is i think i’ve heard of poison but i don’t

i couldn’t tell you any songs yeah because they didn’t they were they were shit yeah okay so that’s

that’s the thing like the the stuff from each age that goes away because grunge in the early 90s

that first group was good they had like four or five bands that were good and then a whole bunch

that came after and kind of like generalized it or made it more pop music they went away they didn’t

last okay so i think you could find that for every generation that but there’s a generation that wants

like their music and it’s just got to be different they want some of that speaks to their experience

don’t they yeah because i was i was uh what would i have been i listened to some pretty i listened to

a lot of ska when i was in my teens ah yeah ska is pretty awful sometimes but i think ska i’ve only

recently started listening to a little bit but it’s for me to me it sounds quite distinct to a lot of

the genres and i can’t always i can’t always pick out what makes this genre special what makes that

special sometimes it sounds the same to me so do you like ska well i think now if you listen to

ska it would be the good ones so again there was all these ska bands that came out at the same time

and most of them were pretty trash that you never would have heard of again the ones that stood the

test of time yeah and that’s that’s the problem like literature suffers from the same thing like we

like oh you go back to a certain era we only remember like let’s say 10 books from the 1940s or the

1930s but how many books were produced at that time were just absolute trash oh yeah and we’re

completely forgotten it’s the same with music it’s i think it’s the same with any art form there’s the

pop version of it that goes away and then there’s like the classics that actually stay so we end up

talking about the classics but we forget the insane volume of shit that came out at the same time

it’s the same rule counts for humans as well oh yeah no it’s i think this is true for everything but

like for art and music and stuff yeah like there’s some stuff that stays but that’s this incredibly

small minority and then there’s all this other stuff that just came out that’s just bullshit and

no one ever is gonna yeah it was forgotten the moment it was produced so buy my book it’s called

montana el diablo it’s available on amazon it’s not one of the trash ones it’s it’s not going to last

beyond my lifetime but it is funny because again i try to make a lot of stuff that’s funny and i don’t

think funny has long historical value so i wouldn’t expect my legacy to be the books that i wrote

okay but montana el diablo the infinite adventure is available on amazon .com

enter the mind of the academy chop my big chest where the best is a philosophy

drinking at lunch brings verbal skills like a sucker punch woke up to see a mock beat

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i’ll see him i’ll be yeah yeah yeah yeah