Tag: Superman

• Music CMcB is an examination and so what I like to do is to sort of find a topic and issue and get deeper into it and what we’re going to get deeper into today is superhero butt holes. You might not have thought that’s where that sentence was going but that’s why.🎙 00:00:00.000–00:00:30.600
• You see me? be as always a magical rainbow of joy, because you’ll never know what’s coming at the end of any sentence, poop. See? And this was weird because we, I started talking to some friends about the Fantastic Four,🎙 00:00:30.600–00:00:47.631
• which is a comic I never read, and I actually know very little about the Fantastic Four, except for the characters therein, who they are. I used to read Spider-Man, the comics, and the Fantastic Four lived in the same city.🎙 00:00:47.631–00:01:02.751
• and there was only one I remember and it’s because Spider-Man encountered a space fire oriented hero, anti-hero, and he couldn’t beat him. And so it was a three comic arc where Spider-Man was running away🎙 00:01:02.738–00:01:20.098
• from this, I think it was Fire Star, but the idea was that he needed to not engage with him so that Fire Star wouldn’t hurt innocent civilians and he tried to get them to this area. He lured him into a building and then collapsed the building, but it didn’t🎙 00:01:21.218–00:01:38.103
• kill him and he knew he’d just like power level wise he couldn’t beat him. And then in a final act of desperation, Spider-Man just like literally just starts physically punching him beating the shit out of him. Firestar never having actually been punched in the face before🎙 00:01:38.103–00:01:54.083
• couldn’t take it. And Spider-Man puts him down and then the fantastic four show up. So I think it’s some earlier point he’d called them for help. That’s that’s all I know about the fantastic four is their kind of friends with Spider-Man.🎙 00:01:54.083–00:02:04.643
• man. I mean, that’s that’s literally it. So there’s the thing. Now, the thing is covered in rocks. Now, I don’t know much about that. I think he has like enhanced strength. I don’t know if it’s because of the rocks. That’s that’s actually a question, but he’s very tough exterior because🎙 00:02:04.641–00:02:25.041
• his exterior is now covered in orange rocks. I don’t know what those orange rocks are made of. He’s not happy about his life. I know that that he doesn’t want to be covered in rocks. And it’s it’s made his life more difficult. And I think.🎙 00:02:25.041–00:02:38.001
• one of the ways he’s made his life more difficult. And this is what set off this conversation is he has to poop. He still is a human inside. He has to eat and he has to poop. But if I have a dog that I clean up his poop🎙 00:02:37.676–00:02:51.356
• and you pick up the poop off the rock, it’s usually concrete or cement. We’re on the road, let’s say. It’s very easy to pick up. You don’t wipe. Now there are two possibilities here. One is that.🎙 00:02:51.356–00:03:08.316
• his butt is covered in pebbles or rocks or something. And that means it’s relatively smooth and the poop would come out without much trouble. So you wouldn’t have to wipe that much. But more logically speaking,🎙 00:03:08.699–00:03:25.459
• because if you have to squeeze poop out as we all do, he would have to clean up afterwards. Now, this would imply to me that the thing does not wipe. He must bidet. Now, if you’ve ever bideted, it’s not particularly powerful.🎙 00:03:25.459–00:03:42.059
• It’s designed to be comfortable for a human butthole, but again, this is a human who’s covered in orange rocks, or in this case, maybe smooth pebbles. So I’m wondering if a bidet would be strong enough.🎙 00:03:41.173–00:03:56.013
• We know the absolute minimum, the thing must bidet. But realistically speaking, to really get sort of all the crevices and whatnot, he probably has to power wash, which would mean either he has a uniquely created bathroom which Mr.🎙 00:03:56.013–00:04:12.613
• Fantastic could say. He’d set up, he’d been being a genius inventor and scientist. He could create a bidet that was powerful enough to clean up the things but, or he has a jet set up in our special room that’s sort of just like a shower room where he can like🎙 00:04:12.613–00:04:31.736
• kind of position himself and just set it off. Or he has a very friendly associate who is willing to do this for him and actually just power sprays his butt hole. There is another alternative. There is another possibility is that the things digestive system has been changed.🎙 00:04:31.736–00:05:09.876
• So again, not knowing enough about the characters. I don’t know what he eats. So maybe he eats rocks and poop dust or pebbles Which would be very easy to clean up then. I don’t know Maybe he eats rock and then with the pressure of🎙 00:04:50.008–00:05:06.848
• The things powerful digestive system that is now rock oriented Poops diamonds And that is actually a very real possibility So this is something this is something that again and when you watch superhero movies🎙 00:05:07.328–00:05:19.788
• stuff. You follow your favorite Marvel heroes. Do they poop? How do they poop? So Spider Man is just a kid. He’s gained super powers. He poops completely normally, I assume. Daredevil, just a guy, has like echolocation of sorts. Poops normally. Now the Fantastic🎙 00:05:20.084–00:05:42.644
• Four also has a character called the Flame. I don’t actually know if that’s his name. I know he has fire based powers. This was interesting because really if you think about it, you are… flame and you poop.🎙 00:05:42.644–00:05:58.138
• You don’t have to wipe. So he’s in human form. He goes to the toilet and then he just goes, flame on. I know that’s the only thing I know. He says flame on. Flame on and then he would burn any poop particulate away🎙 00:05:58.138–00:06:12.278
• because it’s outside his body. It doesn’t explain what happens internally which leads me to an interesting secondary question because let’s say the flame gets coronavirus or a flu or something. A fever is designed to kill the…🎙 00:06:12.278–00:06:56.798
• virus in your body. If he flames on, does that immediately kill all the virus within his body? Is he’s not immune? He can catch it, but he can catch it every single day. Flame on. He’s burned it. He’s killed all the virus in his body because we don’t know anything about his internal temperature🎙 00:06:31.013–00:06:51.933
• because logically speaking, if his internal temperature gets that high, it should actually like burn his heart. So his heart and all his internal organs must be somehow immune. to this incredibly high temperature.🎙 00:06:51.933–00:07:03.836
• So it would say to me that he cannot get a fever because his body’s immune to high temperatures, but he does have the ability to flame on, turn his body into a human torch. Oh, it’s the human torch, not flame.🎙 00:07:03.836–00:07:22.396
• I would like to point out that I did not do a significant amount of research before I did this. You think if I had done any sort of research, I would know the names of the character. factors, which I do not. I did look up one, and it was the laziest name I’ve ever come🎙 00:07:24.156–00:07:39.932
• across in all of history. But the human torch must be immune internally to high temperatures, which means he can’t get a fever to fight the virus, but he could flame on and then burn it out. I know that there’s an interesting thing if you get syphilis. What you can do🎙 00:07:39.932–00:08:01.332
• is get malaria, and the fever from the malaria is so hot. it actually kills the syphilis. And then hopefully you survive the malaria. You can go off and get syphilis again. I don’t know why it’s a weird loop. When I learned about🎙 00:08:01.332–00:08:15.970
• that fact, it was a weird loop that stuck in my head that if you get syphilis, go get malaria and then you can go get syphilis again. You just loop that forever. And no problem. So do all firepower people, people with firepower have this ability? Or there is the second🎙 00:08:15.970–00:08:34.710
• dairy alternative. that once the virus, if it’s strong enough to get into the human torch’s body, that because he cannot generate a fever physically, that he’s actually really, really susceptible to diseases,🎙 00:08:34.710–00:08:51.728
• which I would be very surprised by. So that’s something to take into account when you think of the human torch. Then we move on to Mr. Fantastic. No, Mr. Fantastic. Stretchy powers. Let’s look okay in comics.🎙 00:08:51.728–00:09:08.689
• I’ve actually never been impressed by stretchy as a power. So we have Mr. Fantastic and then the wife from The Incredibles. A Last a Girl, I believe is the name. Again no research done at all before him.🎙 00:09:08.689–00:09:22.689
• But our poop themed questions. The last of persons, the last of people, Mr. Fantastic has the ability to stretch his body in all kinds of almost magical way. So stretches arms really far stretch really wide and block bullets🎙 00:09:22.689–00:09:42.694
• Become incredibly flexible. I assume we also become rigid Which almost makes me not want to talk about when mistering fantastic poops He’s able to there’s two choices again. I came up with Able to flex the internal organs and body in such a way that it could come out in an incredibly🎙 00:09:43.414–00:10:07.974
• fast single powerful move that maybe there’s no wiping needed necessary. No wipes needed. Or, and this was to me the grosser one, could descend to such a degree that the fecal matter would just drop out and no🎙 00:10:07.974–00:10:29.574
• wiping would be necessary. Once I started thinking about this, this is the problem is once you have the thought, I started thinking about the things poop, wiping, and how problematic that would be. It then led me to extrapolate on every character in that team and then of course expand into🎙 00:10:29.574–00:10:48.202
• the greater superhero pantheon. I hate stretchy abilities. I actually, as soon as you start thinking about what they can and cannot do, it’s really gross. Everything they do is kind of gross. And I know they’re in planning a new Fantastic Four movie, but stretchy powers just don’t🎙 00:10:48.202–00:11:07.242
• look cool. And that’s a problem with Mr. Fantastic is even if Mr. Fantastic is. is a cool character, stretchy powers don’t look good. Now we get to the final member of the Fantastic Four, the fourth member, Invisible Woman, which I actually looked up to check, because I🎙 00:11:07.242–00:11:24.457
• was like invisibility girl or something. It’s Invisible Woman, which is the laziest name. So you have the thing, the human torch, Mr. Fantastic, and Invisible Woman, which is like an afterthought. So I feel really bad calling her Invisible Woman. We need a better name. Even like…🎙 00:11:24.457–00:11:43.897
• invisibility girl. No, that’s still pretty lazy. I think when you put woman and girl in it, it’s a bit. Yeah, the thing, human torch, Mr. Fantastic. You could have a Mrs. something. That would be better. I feel like the writers dropped it on this one.🎙 00:11:44.188–00:12:04.988
• So perfectly normal human being can turn invisible. When they poop is the poop invisible. It’s really the question, the only question. We think all the other functions must be normal. You got a YAP.🎙 00:12:06.028–00:12:33.708
• you got a bidet, you want to do whatever you want. So we actually don’t have to talk about that, which is weirdly good, but I had an extended conversation with my friend, Mr. Warmhands, about would the poop remain invisible🎙 00:12:19.456–00:12:35.496
• or would as the poop left the body become visible as it left the body if an invisible woman decided to be invisible while she was pooping? Now I realized really quickly. Invisible woman doesn’t have to take off all her clothes to become invisible.🎙 00:12:36.616–00:12:55.558
• She can wear those clothes, which means that the invisibility isn’t limited to the skin of the person with the power. It’s not the only person to have invisibility powers. But it does mean that it’s a surface level thing that you almost generate a field around🎙 00:12:55.558–00:13:15.198
• you that creates invisibility. So it’s like I’m wearing my clothes. the bubble goes around my clothes. So I think of it as a bubble that goes around you, that creates invisibility, which would mean🎙 00:13:15.198–00:13:29.219
• that the poop is invisible until it leaves the bubble. Now that could mean, again, so let’s say, if you just look at the, well, again, you know, in a video, this is a podcast. I can’t talk about it like on video.🎙 00:13:30.119–00:13:41.399
• But right now I’m wearing a t-shirt and a jacket, and a very light jacket, but it has a hood. Now I don’t want the jacket to be invisible and the hood visible. So, the bubble must encompass everything around me that is in contact with my body completely.🎙 00:13:41.399–00:13:59.281
• I’m wearing glasses. I don’t want when I go invisible just my glasses are floating in the air. So, anything that’s in contact with my body, which would actually just be the sort of horns in the nose bit, but these edge bits still need to be invisible.🎙 00:13:59.281–00:14:13.001
• So, the bubble has to be almost aware enough to cover the entirety of my glasses, the entirety of my t-shirt and jacket. I don’t want just a jacket because if it has to be touching my body, t- Technically, my jacket right now, if I’m wearing a long-sleeve shirt, isn’t touching my body,🎙 00:14:13.001–00:14:28.741
• you would just have a jacket floating in the air. So the bubble, I don’t know if I would be conscious of it as the user or if it’s just an intelligent bubble that covers anything that is on my body, which would mean the poop🎙 00:14:28.741–00:14:42.361
• remains invisible until it disconnects from the body and in this case falls away. So then it would become suddenly visible when it’s in the air. and no longer connected. So that would be like, I’m invisible🎙 00:14:42.361–00:14:58.098
• until I take off my jacket and I throw my jacket away. As soon as I let go of my jacket, the jacket would become visible, I think is what we’re talking about in this situation. Now I started extending the pantheon a little bit🎙 00:14:58.098–00:15:10.458
• and talking about it, thinking about other people. And Superman is the ideal superhero. I find him very boring because of that. Superman technically is powered by the sun. It’s almost like a form of photosynthesis.🎙 00:15:10.458–00:15:26.298
• Photosynthesis is very… efficient, there is no sort of waste matter connected to photosynthesis. But I have actually never seen Superman eat, like canonically. So does Superman eat? So does Superman have any waste products?🎙 00:15:26.298–00:15:44.267
• Is actually the first question. There is the possibility that Superman eats, but his body is so efficient, because again, that’s supposed to be sort of a God super level person, that there is no waste matter🎙 00:15:44.267–00:15:59.427
• every bit gets used. But because the primary source of energy is the sun, it would actually lead us to the question, does Superman have a butthole? Because it’s completely unnecessary. And we also know that when something is unnecessary, generally evolutionary speaking, it sorta🎙 00:15:59.427–00:16:19.314
• disappears. So Superman, by extension, I believe does not have a butthole. Now, I did watch, I have a comic I read once, and it was Superman. It was sorta to play on the idea that Superman is an alien.🎙 00:16:19.314–00:16:57.754
• and it was the first time Superman and Lois Lane were going to have a sexual intercourse. And he takes off his shirt, he has the perfect chest and body and Lois Lane’s like, ooh, she takes off some of her clothes and then he takes off his pants and then she reels back in shock🎙 00:16:34.530–00:16:48.770
• and says, why does it have pincers? And he says in response to grab you because of course Superman is an alien and therefore his genitalia, his physiology is all very different. But we do know that Superman’s species reproduces.🎙 00:16:48.770–00:17:09.463
• We didn’t don’t know exactly how. We’ve never seen it like a sex scene from Krypton. But because everything else is human-esque, there is an implication that Superman has a penis and could reproduce that way.🎙 00:17:09.463–00:17:21.943
• So let’s just give him that. But if he’s powered by the sun, there’s actually no reason for him to have a butthole because he doesn’t expel any feces because there’s no feces to expel. I did like the idea, though.🎙 00:17:21.943–00:18:07.503
• He’s so efficient, he doesn’t poop. So he eats a pizza. Every bit of the pizza is used perfectly within the body system, but then that also would imply that there is no poop. That actually offsets old theory I did🎙 00:17:38.766–00:17:58.406
• in the old podcast, Velocipodcast, is how does Superman fly? And one of my theories that it was that you’d need something pushing away from the body, a jet stream. which I think would be an extended super fart.🎙 00:17:58.406–00:18:12.549
• Now, I could just be a single system where Superman opens his mouth or brings Aaron through his nose, goes straight through his body and pushes it out. So it’s not like a stinky fart because it’s not sort of fermenting in the body at all.🎙 00:18:13.749–00:18:27.309
• But that’s actually how Superman would fly. He pushes himself through the air on a jet stream that comes out his butt. That’s why he flies in that way. Like you always see him. He does float like he hovers like a.🎙 00:18:27.309–00:18:41.709
• Osprey, but that just means his butt is aimed downward. And he’s always got his legs in a sort of odd position, and that’s to make sure that he can be like, but of course Superman being Superman doesn’t make fart sounds.🎙 00:18:41.622–00:18:55.742
• It’s just a perfect jet stream shooting down. And then you notice when Superman takes off, there’s always like a away from his feet. Something’s creating that force. No, it’s not a jump. Jumps don’t do that.🎙 00:18:55.742–00:19:11.142
• There’s just be some sort of jet and that jet, there’s only one thing in that area, and that’s his butt hole. That means the fart actually makes a lot of sense. But then it sort of contravenes what I just talked about where he would have no butthole.🎙 00:19:11.142–00:19:23.891
• But he could have a butthole just for flying because that is again evolutionary, very useful thing for someone to have. If you would like me to talk about the buttholes of any of your favorite superheroes, feel free to send me a message. You can send an email to chumpoficechest at gmail.com🎙 00:19:23.891–00:19:45.331
• or you can send a message. I do prefer this system because I get to hear your lovely voice. type.com slash Trump and beef chest. Leave a message. Do you believe your favorite superheroes have buttholes? Would you like those buttholes examined because let’s face it at C. McBe🎙 00:19:45.331–00:20:04.332
• Podcasts, I am more than happy to take a deep look into your favorite superheroes butts.

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