I’d like to talk about
Bruce Boytation, which
is something I knew about inherently because
I had experienced it when I was young.
In the 80s, it was
very hard to find
martial arts movies, which
was a genre I had discovered.
I wanted more Kung Fu action.
I wanted more John
Wu style shooting movies
from Asia, and you had
to take what you could get.
After Bruce Lee’s
death, of course, there
became sort of a vacuum
of power, and nature
hates a vacuum, and so
what the Chinese did has
any approximation of
Bruce Lee that they can find.
So they found mostly
lookalikes, and they
gave them new names, and so just
to give you a sense of the extent.
So these are the ones that are documented.
There means there were dozens,
if not hundreds, more, of these.
But after 1973, we
had the launch of the
career of Bruce Lee,
who is in today’s movie, L.I.
Bruce Lee, L.A.I., Bruce Lee, L.E.,
Bruce Leung, L.E.U.N.G., Bruce Lee, L.Y.
, Bruce Bruce tie,
and Bruce Leung, L.E.I.
The hope was you would see the cover, you’d
see some guy who kind of looks like Bruce
Lee may be dressed
the same, and they’d be
doing in like a pose,
so it’s obviously action
packed, and you’d
see Bruce in Ulf, and
they’d just not even
bother to read the rest,
because now you’re too
busy grabbing the movie
and running to the
front of the video store.
Some other ones they
did were pretty interesting.
Bruce Lee, so B.R.U.T.E.,
L.E.E., Myron Bruce,
that one’s not very
accurate, Lee Bruce,
which I did enjoy the
creativity of that one,
Dragon Lee, and Bronson
Lee, which I assume
is the love child of Charles Bronson and
Bruce Lee, which would not be a good human.
I don’t know why I was going to end
up with that, not a good combination.
On that, they didn’t
just kind of, I want to
use the word parody,
but they’re trying to
copy, but they’re trying
to defraud people into
thinking they’re getting
a Bruce Lee movie.
Some of the movies that
came out re-enter the
dragon, which sounds
weirdly sexual, enter three
dragons, and I think what they did in
this one, they got like Bruce Leung, Bruce
Leung, Bruce Leung,
Bruce Leung, to all be
in the movie together,
Return of Bruce, enter
another dragon, which
again, I don’t know
where my heads are
where those sounds actually.
I don’t think, I guess I just enter is
one of those hot button words for me.
Return of the Fist of
Fury, which I have seen.
I don’t remember
anything about it, but I
know I have seen a
movie called Return of the
Fist of Fury, and the clones of
Bruce Lee, which I know I have seen.
I also again, do not
remember if I can find
those again, I will be
getting them, because
I know the clones of Bruce Lee again
has multiple Bruce Lee lookalikes in it.
Now to me, Bruce Lee’s whole martial
arts philosophy was the definitive feature.
So I think there’s this
look in his style and
stuff, but the definitive
feature of Bruce
Lee was not beholden
to the Kung Fu tradition.
He grew up, he learned Kung Fu, and he
said like these movesets are too limited.
You have to be more fluid, you have to
be more, you have to be able to adjust.
So like set forms are not
the best way to do martial arts.
And it’s why maybe he was a
step above other martial artists.
Most of the movies that I have seen on the
list, and that’s not a comprehensive list.
It’s just from the Wikipedia article.
Most of the movies I’ve seen on this list
of Bruce Lee clone movies, or rip-offs or
frauds, or whatever you want to
call them, use traditional Kung Fu.
So they’re traditional Kung Fu
movies, so there’s a lot of that.
That to me is a marker
of 1960s, ’70s and early
’80s Kung Fu, is that
there’s a single move.
It’s well coordinated,
but it’s a single
move, single move,
single move, and they both,
as they’ve practiced,
it looks really nice.
I have always enjoyed
the athleticism of go
Kung Fu, like I know, I would say that
Kung Fu is not particularly practical.
I’m sorry to hurt anyone’s feelings,
but saying that, it’s better than IKEA-DO.
Am I worried about hurting the
feelings of someone who does IKEA-DO?
Steven Segal, I mean, because IKEA-DO has
Steven Segal, there’s nothing else to say.
He ruined any opportunity for IKEA-DO
to be considered legitimate in any form.
That traditional Kung
Fu, to me, is the most
stark contrast, because I would say that’s
much easier to teach than what Bruce Lee
actually did, which is why,
again, Bruce Lee was different.
So let’s get on
to today’s movie.
This is Shameless Cross Promotion of Chunk
McBeaf Chest’s new YouTube channel, Seemic BIMDB.
For classic action
movies, jokes and reactions,
find it on YouTube,
link in the description.
When I was doing the
Ninja News Japan, I noticed
my air filter started
flashing red, which
means there’s stuff in the air.
Now, it’s blue now,
so it’s cleaned it up a
bit, but I’m weird, I’m going
to start sneezing any time now.
All right, let’s go with a Seemic B.
So I was walking Dave.
Anyone who follows this podcast knows Dave.
Dave is my constant companion.
He is my rescue poodle,
and did he rescue me?
Did I rescue him or did he rescue me?
My cold, broken heart?
No, he’s an annoying piece
of shit, but I love him anyways.
That’s actually just the
reality of pissy little dogs.
He’s like a little Prince
He will not go out
in inclement weather,
which is very important
to the context of this story.
I was walking Dave yesterday morning, and
I was wearing noise canceling headphones.
Now, I am a not particularly
social person, and
I have found that the
world does not understand
what gigantic headphones
means on your head.
If there was any way
to send a message to
the world that I do not want to hear
what you have to say, go fuck yourself.
It would be giant headphones.
And then if you actually
know anything about
headphones, you know,
most of those big ones
are noise canceling, so you are
hearing nothing from the outside world.
I’m walking Dave.
And then I hear just this in the
background, no, I don’t know what it is.
So I turn around to check
because I don’t want to make
sure, like, you know, I have
noise canceling headphones on.
I want to make sure I haven’t
done anything wrong by accident.
I haven’t messed up someone
else’s day to turn around.
And there’s a older woman,
just her mouth is going.
So I’m like, oh, I think that
person might be talking to me.
So I am polite, which maybe is a failing.
So I take off my nose canceling headphones.
I shouldn’t have done that.
I realize this.
I realize I should be
slightly rude or, and
when I hear the, I
should just keep walking.
Don’t turn around.
Don’t check, but I
guess socially I have been
raised to believe that
I should pay attention
to other human beings,
which, you know, at this
point, I’m like, that’s
probably a mistake.
Now, let’s see, as soon as I realized what
this woman was talking to me about, I was
I don’t know if it was last week or two
weeks ago, but I talked about reactants.
And it was like when people tell you to do
something, there is an instinct in humans.
And I reason this
resonated with me is because
there is a significant
instinct in me to not do it.
So this woman starts telling me
stuff and it’s stuff I don’t want to know.
And I am furious.
Now, I’m not going to
do anything because
again, I’m socially responsible enough
to know you don’t beat up old ladies.
But the instinct of the desire to just
lay into her was right there, right away.
She said to me, so she
was speaking in Japanese,
so she said to me
that your dog’s a single
coat poodle and it’s fine in the
summer, but it’s too cold right now.
You need to get him a coat.
You know, I am not
raising a killing machine.
He is my confidante, so I am
very protective of my little friend.
This little fucking prince refuses to go
out if the weather is in any way inclement.
If it is raining at all,
he will not go out.
If it is too windy, he will not go out.
If it is too cold, he will not go out.
So basically I would
open the door in the
morning, I put him on the porch, and he
decides if he wants to go for a walk or not.
The thing is that morning
time is when he has to go to
the toilet, it’s the breakfast
kind of part of the day.
So I really don’t care if he takes a walk.
I want him to go out
there and do his business.
Now, he will look at me like the weather is
inconvenient for me to be pooping in some.
So I shall return inside
the house where it is warm
and comfortable, and I
will poop on your floor.
Is this agreeable to you?
And I look at him and I go,
“No, you little piece of shit.
You’re not pooping on my floor.
We have a whole toilet thing
set up for him that he will not use.
” A couple weeks ago,
inclement weather was raining.
He wouldn’t go outside and poop,
and I’m like, “I have to go to work.
I can’t leave him here.
He’s going to poop on the floor.
I knew he was going
to poop on the floor.
” We’d set up this
doggy pad area, and there
was a yoga mat out and
he pooped on the yoga mat.
He was like, “You piece of shit.
” Because you know what he did?
He pooped on the more comfortable thing.
I see how his little
fucking peanut brain works.
He’s like, “Oh, there’s those pads over
there where you’re supposed to poop.
” But then this yoga
mat’s slightly softer
and it’s more cushiony
on my sensitive paws.
And so he pooped on
that, and so my daughter
came home and she
saw poop on the yoga mat.
She’s like, “I don’t
know if I should clean
that or throw it away, but it
was an expensive yoga mat.
Again, little prince
of Persia over here,
pooping on the most
expensive thing he can find.
Don’t think that was accidental.
If I had my expensive shoes out, I guarantee
there would be poop in those shoes.
I have my own negative
feelings towards my
little friend over here, my
little gray fluffy poof face.
But the reason I’m
angry and not going to
take any advice from
this lady is she had come
to the park with her
poodle in a coat and a
baby stroller with the baby
stroller completely covered in plastic.
So it was essentially a greenhouse.
She’s walking to the
park, starting telling me
about how I should
better take care of my dog.
You don’t even have a
dog, like what you have
now is a marshmallow
that is barely sentient.
And the way you’re
treating it shows that
you’re not actually
thinking like, “Okay, yeah,
I didn’t put a coat on
my dog because I know
if the dog is too cold, he’s just going
to turn around and go back in the house.
I do have a coat for him, we can’t
put him on, I can’t make him go outside.
” But I now have actually
come to trust his instincts.
If he’s not comfortable,
going to fucking let me know because I
don’t make decisions in this relationship.
I just follow orders, which has given him
this pissy attitude where he thinks he can
shit on yoga mats, but also Dave does
have the survival skills to back it up.
So the reason we got Dave, Dave
is a rescue and what had happened
to Dave is some piece of shit
out there, dumped him in a forest.
Now, a pretty little dog, you think,
not going to survive in a forest.
My first thought was always,
he did it without thumbs.
I have thumbs, so I
can do things and make
things and grab and
dig and things like that.
I would die in a forest pretty
quickly like I wouldn’t make it.
Let’s just face facts.
I got a skill set, that skill
set is designed for a modern
society where pretty much
everything’s taken care of for me.
Put me in a wildlife situation
and I am not wildlife, I am food.
Dave, for an entire
month, survives in a forest.
I don’t know what he’s eating.
I assume it was grass and bugs because
he’s not catching anything, he’s too slow.
He survived, he’s a
poodle, so his hair just
grew and grew and grew
and grew, so he looked
like this giant sheep, he was
underfed, but that’s how we got him.
This dude is a survivor and
how he ended up with us with his
life where he’s now like, I will
only shit on yoga mats, okay.
He’s paid his, he’s done his time, this
woman with the fucking dog and a baby stroll
or pissed me off so much because I’m
like, you are so far gone the other way.
You should not be telling
anyone how to live their lives.
And she’s acting like I’m ignorant.
I’m like, no, it’s still an animal,
it still needs to walk by itself.
You don’t put in a fucking
baby stroll or you fucking psycho.
You make it walk from
your house to the park.
You make it do things, like I’m just
thinking it’s hearts can explode really soon.
I do get, you want your
animals to be comfortable.
My dog sleeps on a bed
on my bed, it’s double
bedded, but I also
know if I stick that
little fucker in a forest, he’s going
to survive for at least a month.
And he’s earned the
right to have this chill
time where you and
your animal absolutely
have not talked a lot
about capitalism and
seeming to be for the
last little while because
it’s new stories
that come up and it’s
I’m finding very interesting
on late stage capitalism is
something we talk about a lot.
It seems to be an
experiment that is widening
the gap between the
rich and the poor, which
is going to lead to a problem sooner
or later, ironically, for rich people.
And that’s the bit I think they
don’t get, like this gap is bad for them.
But it’s also leads me
into really weird stories,
just stories of companies
it’s rich people thinking they can do
whatever they want and get away with it.
And when they can’t get
away with it, it’s always
a bit of a come up and
so there was a woman
and she had a newsletter
and in her newsletter,
she talked about eBay
and an eBay Amazon
lawsuit specifically 30 minutes after
publishing this story in her newsletter.
The CEO of eBay sent a
message to another executive
saying, if you’re going to
take her down, now is the time.
So my first thought was,
CEOs don’t do very much.
There was someone
pointed out that Elon Musk is
the CEO of seven
companies and that’s supposed
to sound impressive,
but it actually makes
you think the CEO clearly
doesn’t do that much
if he can be CEO of
seven companies at the
same time, like he’s not
making real day-to-day decisions.
He’s not really like
guiding the company if he
can do seven or eight
companies at the same time.
So the more company someone is the CEO of
actually means, in my mind, they are less
effective as a CEO,
but this CEO sent this
message to the security
director and he sent
a message out and he said, this
bias to troll needs to be burned down.
So what did they do?
And this was to me the more important part
was like, what did this meeting look like?
So you have the security director.
There’s two people actually are doing
jail time for this right now and two people
are still kind of having
it worked out like
what their participation in this was
because this was organized harassment.
The actual crimes, let’s put the crimes
out there first, obstruction of justice.
So pretty obviously they were trying
to not help the police catch them.
They were using intimidation tactics
as part of their harassment campaign.
So the idea that
they would do witness
tampering is not actually
out of it and at all.
Stalking, interstate travel
stalking and online stalking.
So what were they actually doing?
So the security director
seems to be primarily
these current actions.
The CEO who said, like, go get this
lady, he quit before this was finished.
And then the current CEO
was like, oh, sorry, it wasn’t us.
It was the previous CEO and now he’s
not involved, so he’s not getting arrested.
I wasn’t involved.
So I’m not getting arrested.
This seems like a very
CEO oriented style trick.
And I think everyone should
get a little something out of that.
Oh, she actually said, we continue
to extend our deepest apologies.
And then we’ve had new
leadership since then, and
of course, we’re doing
our better to train people.
Do you have to train people
to not harass other people?
That’s a very good question
that should be put out there.
But first of all, it started
with online threats.
So the people, the security people at eBay
were sending threats to this person who had
a newsletter talking
about a lawsuit between
eBay and Amazon, which
actually makes me think
that’s one step away from it.
I’m doing right now.
I talk about companies suing
each other and stuff all the time.
I guess her newsletter
was more popular than my
podcast, makes me
feel a little sad right now.
They surveyed their home using employees.
So imagine in this
part, you’re working at
eBay, you’re just a
security guard, I assume,
because this security
guy would have sort of his
purview would be over
the security personality.
He’d be like, you got a
special mission for you.
And I was like, wow, does
eBay have special missions?
You’re going to go and do a stakeout
and like, dude, I’m a security guard.
I like walk around the hallways.
I do not do stakeouts like, no,
no, you’re going to do a stakeout.
You’re going to go to this person’s house.
I don’t even know if
this is actually accurate.
I don’t know if it was a security personnel
or if this security director was just like
any staff, he’s like, I want you, IT
guy to go stakeout this lady’s house.
And the IT guy’s like,
well, leave the office.
That sounds great.
There are a lot of questions there of how
this went down, which is these fundamental
details are the most interesting part
to me because they don’t give them out.
I’m actually, I construct
them in the head in my head.
You can actually see where I’m going, but
so he has a conversation with something.
I want you to go and
survey this person’s house.
You can do a stakeout.
You’re going to watch when they come
home, when they leave, you’re getting paid.
You’re getting your
paid, your salary to role
play as a detective
or a cop or like, some
of them hero you have from a movie.
So someone was on board with this.
They surveyed their house.
They tracked their
movements and then they’re
like, okay, we’ve got to do some
harassment because of course.
And they’re like, okay, so they must have
had a meeting and they’re like, okay, so
they have a meeting, security director sits
down with some other guys in the office.
These are all office personnel, okay.
We have this woman,
she sent out a newsletter
and we’d like to make
sort of a response
to that that eBay is
not particularly pleased
with how she’s presented
us within this new
within the construct of
the newsletter she’s created,
there’s a lawsuit going on.
We don’t think she
should be talking about it.
We don’t really appreciate her opinion.
So we were thinking a great
idea to send her some live spiders.
If I was in a business meeting
and that came out, I’d be like, what?
No, you can’t send someone live spiders.
That’s not a good thing to do.
He’s like, no, no, okay.
Live spiders and second package,
cockroaches, live cockroaches.
How about we send them
some live cockroaches?
And again, I’d be saying to me,
I’m going like, this seems unhinged.
This seems like a bad idea.
This seems like not the way we should forge
forward into a new future with our company.
Sending people we don’t like
live cockroaches and live spiders.
Oh, we’re not going to stop there.
We’re going to send them a bloody pig mask.
Now I’m going to go ahead
and guess the blood was not real.
The bloody pig mask was sort of the
description of the mask, the whole mask.
So I actually at that
point was like a free mask.
I mean, that’s not so bad.
Live spiders live cockroaches, I don’t
want that in my house, bloody pig mask.
Halloween’s taken care of, I guess.
And then finally, a book on
recovering from the death of a spouse.
So a slightly veiled
threat that your spouse
may or may not die
soon and how you could
get over it should this
incident happen coupled
with pig mask, live
spiders, live cockroaches.
Something a message that
the harassment is quite clear.
The punishment for eBay was $3 million
fine, which I feel like that’s not enough.
I feel like company like
eBay is a big company.
These two guys did jail time, but yeah, I’m
just like, did they, I guess I don’t know
the fallout for the actual
people who were being harassed.
But that is organized
harassment by an online retailer.
And at some point,
they thought this was
okay, they were going
to get away with this.
This is a good thing to do.
So thankfully, I have never and
I’m never going to shop at eBay.
I was just about to
say I was never going to
talk about eBay, but I just, I’m
sure they don’t want that out there.
So I get some live
spiders actually not that,
you know, because I’m assuming
the spiders were in a package.
So like they didn’t just like scurry out
like they wouldn’t know horror movie.
Like that would be bad because
that have spiders all over my house.
I would have to catch them.
I wouldn’t be as
freaked out the pig mask,
free pig mask, the book,
I don’t know, depends
how well it’s written
to be honest, but
capitalism, you can
see, I actually blame that
on the high level C
suite executives feeling
they can do whatever they want to,
whomever they want and get away with it.
Well, it turns out in communist
countries, same problem.
So it’s not inherently
capitalism that’s the issue.
I guess you could.
Maybe this is capitalism as
well or this is capitalist attitude.
I’m not sure.
But this is in China, a Chinese advertising
agency said we’re going to move our office
from the city, fairly large city to
a countryside and remote location.
And there is some
suspicion that they did this
on purpose to try to
get the employees to quit.
So let’s give you the whole story.
They moved from the city to a
mountain with limited transportation.
Now what does that mean?
It’s a two hour commute one way.
So basically if you don’t
have a car, there were
almost no options to
actually get to this office.
If you had a car, you had to drive two
hours and the company saying we’re not going
to pay you for the wear and tear on
your car, the gas or anything like that.
There was a bus every three hours.
But if you even managed
to catch the bus and
take it to the location,
you still had a three
kilometer walk from the
bus stop to the office.
If you took a taxi,
you could take a taxi
from the train station
to the office, but the
company wouldn’t cover
the cost for the for the taxi.
So they were like, all the
burden is on the employee.
They’d say that sounds
pretty bad because
they’re making this
commute miserable, they’re
making it impossible for
you to come to the office.
That was not it.
The building itself had no women’s toilet.
So if you were a woman
and you worked for
this company, you had to walk to
the nearest village to use a public toilet.
They said that this was made worse
because the straight dogs made it unsafe.
And after dark, it was worse.
I guess the dogs get buffed after dark.
It’s like those zombie
movies where the
zombies are bad during the
day, but at night, they’re worse.
There were 20 employees
and 14 after only a few days.
It was four days later, 14
of the employees had quit.
So then the company
moved back, their
headquarters back to the city and immediately
put on an ad looking for new employees.
The employees were like, hey, we
don’t think this was a sincere move.
We think you move the office to
try to make us all uncomfortable.
So we would quit so
that you could, instead of
firing us because there
is within the contracts
in China, you have
to, if you fire a group
of people or you do
something like that, you
have to compensate them and you
didn’t want to pay that compensation.
So you moved to an
office, not sincerely and
you waited for us to quit and then
you moved right back to the city.
That’s what we think happened.
The company’s like, we’re
going to sue you for slander.
That is not what happened.
We moved to the countryside because we had
to and yes, there were no ladies toilets
and you had to walk through wild dogs to
get to them, but that was not on purpose.
That was not part of our plan.
They said rent was high and the
new office was being renovated.
So we temporarily moved
there from where we were before.
Now the employees
were told that the new
location was a headquarters
for at least a year if not more.
So what they’re saying
is like, oh, we knew
this was only going to take a
couple of weeks for renovation.
But the employees are saying,
that’s not what you said to us.
You said, we were going to be working
there for potentially years in China.
If you change location
consent, it is actually
a breach of contact.
And so this company is now in trouble.
I don’t have a lot of access to
Chinese news if I’m being honest.
I do want to follow
up in this story and
see if the company
gets in trouble, how much
they get sued for and
stuff, but it’s not going
to be like the eBay thing where
everything’s on the internet and available.
It’s going to be a lot
harder for me to get.
But it seems like the
nature of companies be it
in a capitalist or
communist society is exactly
the same and at the end
of the day, we’re all fucked.
But most importantly of all, don’t
listen to crazy ladies in the park.